A few days ago, I had the privilege of leading a wellness workshop in honor of International Self-Care Day. We talked about something I believe with all my heart: the importance of pausing, tending to ourselves, and making wellness part of our everyday lives—not something we save for vacations or weekends.
I was telling my friend Laura about the workshop and she smiled and said something that caught me completely off guard.
“Donna, when are you going to start taking your own advice?”
Brutal? Yes.
Honest? Absolutely.
She wasn’t criticizing me. She cared enough to tell me the truth. The truth was, I had been pouring so much energy into my family, our team, our customers, and growing Gardenuity that I had quietly stopped paying attention to myself. As much as I wanted to argue with her, I couldn’t.
She was right.
It reminded me of something we often say at Gardenuity:
You can’t water a garden with an empty watering can.
The more I thought about it, the more I realized our gardens have been teaching us this lesson all along.
Before I share the lessons my garden has taught me, I want to acknowledge someone who has helped change the conversation around what it means to thrive. Arianna Huffington, someone I’ve had the privilege of knowing and have admired both personally and professionally for many years, made talking about burnout real. After her own experience with exhaustion, she challenged the long-held belief that burnout is simply the price of success. Instead, she reminded us that taking care of ourselves isn’t a luxury—it’s what allows us to do our best work and live our fullest lives. It’s a message that has stayed with me ever since.
Every time I pick up a watering can, I’m reminded of that same truth.
Fill Your Own Watering Can First
Plants don’t apologize for needing sunlight, water, or healthy soil. They simply take what they need to grow. Somewhere along the way, many of us began believing that taking care of ourselves was selfish instead of necessary.
The truth is just the opposite.
When we refill our own energy, we have more patience for our families, more creativity to bring to our work, and more joy to share with the people around us. Self-care isn’t about stepping away from the people who need us; it’s about making sure we have something meaningful to give when we show up.
Growth Happens Through Small, Consistent Habits
No gardener expects one watering to sustain a plant for an entire season. Growth happens because we show up consistently, often in ways that seem too small to matter.
The same is true for our own well-being. A walk around the block. Five quiet minutes with a cup of coffee. Harvesting fresh herbs for dinner. Watering a plant before opening your laptop. These moments rarely feel life-changing in the moment, but over time they become the habits that shape how we feel and how we live.
Pay Attention Before Something Starts Wilting
Healthy gardeners notice the little things. A leaf begins to droop. The soil feels dry. A once-vibrant plant starts asking for attention in quiet ways.
What if we paid that same kind of attention to ourselves?
Sometimes our own “drooping leaves” show up as exhaustion, impatience, trouble sleeping, or feeling disconnected from the people we love. Those aren’t signs that we’ve failed. They’re reminders that something in us needs tending.
Rest Is Part of Growth
Not every season is meant for blooming. Some seasons are spent building stronger roots.
Gardens remind us that slower seasons aren’t wasted seasons. Often, the most important growth is happening beneath the surface, long before anyone else can see it. We all have times when our greatest accomplishment isn’t producing more—it’s restoring enough energy to begin again.
Tend What Matters Most
The healthiest gardens aren’t the ones with the most plants. They’re the ones that receive consistent care.
Life works much the same way. Our health, our relationships, our purpose, our families, and our friendships don’t flourish simply because we think about them. They flourish because we tend to them, little by little, day after day.
Laura’s question has stayed with me, not because it made me feel guilty, but because it reminded me that wellness isn’t something we teach. It’s something we practice.
This Week’s Tending
Pour yourself a cup of coffee or tea. Fill a glass of water. Then call that friend.
You know the one.
The friend who can be brutally honest because they love you enough to tell you the truth. The friend who has seen you at your worst and never walked away. The one who sees you—not the version of you that you think everyone expects.
Tell them you’re grateful.
Ask them how they’re really doing.
Then, before you hang up, make one small promise to each other: to tend to yourselves with the same care you so freely give everyone else.
After all, you can’t water a garden with an empty watering can.
